God's Building Plans

I've been thinking a lot lately about the trials, adversities and "speed bumps" that come to us on life's journey.  However, it hasn't been my difficulties I've pondered but those of my children and their families.  Like all of us some trials are self-imposed by our choices, and some by the choices of other people. And, like it or not, sometimes life is just really tough.  As the bumper sticker says, "Life is hard--and then you die."

But I also believe that at times our Heavenly Father, in His wonderful and often unexplainable way, will provide us personal tutoring so that we and our families might grow in wisdom and holiness.  The great Christian thinker and writer, C.S. Lewis, likened it to "God's building plan" for us.  Here's what he wrote (I apologize if this is a redo but it's been on my mind as I've read some of your heart wrenching blogs):

"Imagine yourself as a living house. God comes in to rebuild that house. At first, perhaps, you can understand what he is doing. He is getting the drains right and stopping the leaks in the roof and so on. You knew that those jobs needed doing and so you are not surprised.

But presently he starts knocking the house about in a way that hurts abominably and does not seem to make sense. What on earth is he up to? The explanation is that he is building quite a different house from the one you thought of—throwing out a new wing here, putting on an extra floor there, running up towers, making courtyards.

You thought you were going to be made into a decent little cottage, but he is building a palace. He intends to come and live in it himself."

Importance of Celebrating

I've been thinking about the importance in our lives that celebrations can play.  Celebrating is a way of:
--remembering as in birthdays and anniversaries
--rejoicing as in babies being born
--well wishing as in I gave my friend, Harry, a card and a balloon yesterday--the last day of his radiation treatment for prostate cancer
--starting something new as at weddings (one of Melba and my regrets is that we low keyed our marriage and didn't have any kind of celebration for our friends and family)
--thanking someone as in when your office mates take you to lunch for your retirement
--congratulating someone on an achievement such as our son or daughter's graduation 

Whether big or small I recommend we all look for opportunities to celebrate with our spouses, our children, our grandchildren and our friends.  It's a nice way to say "I care--you are important to me".

Out of sight but not out of mind

Almost a year ago to the day my sister Diane along with her husband, Sean, their son William and a cuddly black Labrador named Cindy pulled up to our house in their three cars.  The previous year had been really tough for them: Sean had lost his job as a patent attorney and after exhausting their savings were forced to sell their lovely home in a recessed market.  They had become part of the new formerly affluent homeless and we welcomed them into our home for as long as they needed to be here.
 
They really liked the wet, cool NW and for awhile it looked as though they might find gainful employment here but nothing worked out.  Finally, they decided to return to Fresno, CA to begin a new phase of their life.  Sean will begin a private law practice, Diane will find a job with benefits, and William will start college.

This past year has blessed us in so many ways.  Here are only a few:

--We got to know Sean in a new and deeper way and he us, too
--William became my own personal video master, fighting some of my more challenging boss battles for me
--Diane cooked most of the meals for her family and me (Melba has her own special regime of Crohn's friendly foods)
--Communal living worked well for us because everyone pitched in and really worked at accommodating each other and in being sensitive to everyone's space; mutual cooperation and consideration were our watch words and it worked well

I will miss having this part of our family with us.  On the bright side, we are once again an "empty nest" and that has it's benefits as well.

Birthday Reflections

I first saw the light of day 67 years ago today.  It was a Friday then, too, and I was born in the old Seaside Navy hospital in Long Beach, CA.  I have never had a problem with any birthday except when I turned 50--I was depressed for two years then snapped out of it.  Today I am at peace with my age and my place in my own life cycle.  Here are some things I like and dislike at this time of my life.

I LIKE:
--Being retired and not working for someone else
--Having a steady, secure income not dependent on the whims of the stock market
--Being married to my sweetheart and best friend, Melba
--Seeing my five kids succeed in their life goals
--The wonderful women my sons have chosen to marry
--Staying in touch with my 24 grandchildren--they keep me young
--Serving in the temple every Wednesday--it charges my spiritual batteries
--Working with our gardener to maintain and beautify our yard
--Serving as high priest group leader
--Trying to stay physically fit through exercising
--Practicing the guitar/banjo/piano
--The close relationship I have with my siblings--they are in the "inner circle" of my closest friends
--People who are incurable optimists even when carrying heavy personal burdens--they inspire me to do better with my own less heavy problems
--Doing family history and then taking my ancestors to the temple to do their work for them
--The richness of the spirit that seems to come more frequently as I pray, study the scriptures, serve others or attend the temple--it's more comforting than ever to know that God knows who Larry Barry is

I DON'T LIKE:
--Seeing my mother and my friends get older and some dying like Dick Russell and Gary Froseth and Richard Elliott
--Aches and pains that have no obvious cause but just come with the territory
--Seeing Melba suffer with the cancer she had (2xs), the Crohn's, the knee problem and the arthritis--if I could I would carry it for her
--Political fanaticism on the left or the right
--That much of our social life is comprised of medical personnel
--People who can only see life as "half empty"

Hope you all have a wonderful day today!

Graduation a time of reflection

Monday evening I attended my nephew, William's high school graduation. I sat with his proud parents and thoroughly enjoyed the festive evening.  Somewhere during the ceremony I drifted off into thoughts of my own high school years and senior graduation.  Some reflections:

--High school was fun for me--hanging out with friends, playing french horn in the orchestra, battling 4'11" Tony Betterton on the tennis court (truly Mutt and Jeff--I won the match)
--Family life chaotic at times--I gave my folks a rough go of it--sorry about that Mom and Dad
--Excited about attending College of the Sequoias, until I had my first course and realized they were serious about learning--who'da thunk?
--Losing touch with long-time friends as we went our separate ways into adulthood
--Gaining new friends--and then losing touch with them as well in the years ahead
--After two years at COS, departing for two wonderful and long years in Argentina preaching and teaching the restored gospel of Christ

As the song goes "Thanks for the memories".

The Beauty of Lists

I like lists. No, to be more precise I need lists. In fact, I'm a compulsive list maker.  It is the trademark of my long-standing OCD and I wear it like a badge of honor.

I have three standard lists I use all the time. First, I make a list the first of each month of things to accomplish during the next 30/31 days.  Second, every week I compile a seven day list. This provides focus from Monday through Sunday. And finally, every morning I make a "to do list" for that day.

Part of the joy of list making comes when I cross an item off the list.  So....the first thing I write on the daily list is:  "Make a daily list"--then, as soon as I complete the list, I scratch right through the first item--how sick is that?

Yesterday's list is fairly typical (the numbers are the priority order given each item):

2 Devotional time
1 Exercise
8 Set up home teaching visits
3 Email the bishop re: proposed home teaching changes
6 Clean desk
4 Vacuum
5 Sweep kitchen
7 Buy azaleas
9 Practice guitar and/or banjo and/or piano

I have a separate list for Melba--it's called the "A" list and she's the only person on it and it trumps all other lists.

The week of our social debut

Health problems for both of us have kept us pretty much close to home this past year.  BUT...things are changing!  For example:

--Thursday evening we went with our dear friends, Dolly and Harry (our Mexico cruise buddies) to Dairy Queen
--Last night Melba and I had dinner at Sizzler--I had a ribeye steak with baked potato and she had macaroni and cheese, also with a baked potato
--This morning we ventured out to the early (10:20am) matinee showing of Iron Man2

We thoroughly enjoy these simple things and are grateful for them.

Next?  We're thinking road trip to Utah, Arizona and California the end of September or first of October.

Watch out...WE'RE BACK!!